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Nothing is worse than being so broke that you have to ask a friend for a loan of money—well, maybe having to ask a friend to return money you’ve lent them.

Requesting money from friends can be somewhat uncomfortable. Even while it makes you uncomfortable, being out of money when you’re already having trouble making ends meet is undoubtedly worse.

We’ve put up some advice on how to approach your friends about requesting them to pay back their debts in light of this.

Avoid being uncivil

When requesting money from your friend, avoid becoming contentious if you truly cherish your friendship. Even though you might be upset that this has happened, if you act uncivilly, you risk losing both your money and your friendship.

Given that you volunteered to lend the money in the first place, you clearly have a good heart and caring disposition. Remember this: If you can maintain your composure, you have a considerably higher chance of escaping the scenario uninjured.

Give clues regarding your personal financial status.

It’s reasonable to say that nobody like being asked for money and that nobody wants to ask for it themselves. It may not seem like it, but both parties are under equal stress, therefore the less worrisome situation, the better.

Try giving a few subtle clues here and there before dumping the “give me my money back” bombshell. Saying something like, “I’m sorry, but I’m too tight to come to the pub tonight.”

You can avoid having that dreaded talk completely if your friend is perceptive enough to see your cues. Well worth a shot!

Educating your acquaintance about your financial circumstances ought to benefit them.

Be flexible about receiving money back

Depending on the circumstances of your situation, like how much money it was that your friend originally borrowed from you, it might make the situation a bit less stressful if you suggest they repay you in a few instalments.

This way, you can start seeing at least some of your cash again. And it will show your friend that you really are sympathetic towards their situation. Win-win.

Add a sense of urgency


Adding a sense of urgency to your request will help your friend to understand that you are now in a tricky financial situation after lending them the cash.

Phrases like, “I’m sorry to ask this, but I really need that money to pay an energy bill by the end of this month”, would work well. Don’t set the deadline too soon, though, otherwise, you could get your friend into a real panic.

Give them a bit of notice so they can scrape the cash together first.

Should you lend money to friends?

It might seem a bit late to be discussing this now if you’ve already lent your friend some cash. But, just think of these as tips for future reference.

Before lending friends money, it’s important to consider the following factors:

Can you afford to lend someone money?

Lending cash to friends can be particularly tough if you’re a student. It’s hard enough to support yourself on a Student Loan, never mind having to help others. Don’t feel under pressure to dish out cash if you don’t have the budget for it.Unless you’ve agreed on a repayment deadline, you have no idea exactly when your mate will be able to pay you back. You have to be sure you’re in a situation where you’ll be able to survive without that cash for a relatively long time.

Think about why you’re lending the cash

If you’re planning to lend your mate money solely for the purpose of showing them that you care, that you value their friendship and want to make sure they’re okay, our advice would be not to do it.Although this is incredibly decent of you, you can’t make this your primary reason for lending them cash. That is, unless you can honestly say that you won’t mind if you never see your money again.Think ahead to a situation where your friend is unable to pay you back and you have to continuously ask them for it. This could put a whole load of pressure on your friendship and have a negative impact. Remember the risks involved there.

Why do they need the money?

We can all agree that it’s probably ok to lend your mate a few quid to help them pay the rent. But is that why they’re asking you for money?If they’re just looking to spend the money on a night out, or buy some new clothes, seriously consider whether it’s worth parting with your cash. This is especially true if you’re already hard-up yourself.

Have they tried other ways to earn money?

We’re kind of stating the obvious here, but borrowing money from friends isn’t the only solution to a cash crisis.Your friend has a few options. Point them in the direction of your university’s money advice service. They could be eligible for funding from the uni’s hardship funds, or even some bursaries and scholarships that they weren’t previously aware of.They should definitely avoid payday loans. There are alternative funding options that could help them get their bank balance looking healthy again, without any of the risks associated with high-interest loans.

Do you trust them to pay you back?

As we’re talking about friends here, it’s likely that you’ll automatically believe you can trust them to pay you back… because they’re your mate.But remember that if someone is particularly bad with money, they might find it genuinely difficult to stick to money-related promises.Do you know if they’ve borrowed money from friends before? Did they pay them back? Have a think about this before you commit to anything.

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